Can you imagine yourself walking into a room full of people, and they are acting weirdly towards you? Not too long ago, me and a friend were just discussing stuff as usual, and basically my friend mentioned something that her and I have in common…and I’m sure a lot of people do have this in common with us too. Basically, someone told her something about someone else (this wasn’t gossip…well I wasn’t there, but this situation doesn’t necessarily only happen with gossip), and from then on, she looked at the person in a different way than she used too.When she said this, I had to point out that the occurrence also takes place in me when someone tells me something about someone else. For example, someone could say to me “Person A is a clingy person, and she annoys me”. From then on, because of the “simple statement”, when I do see Person A, that statement plays back in my head maybe, and although I may still talk with Person A and stuff, my view of her has been somehow…tampered with.
This is very unfair for various reasons; if you have a problem with someone, it’s best you confront them not matter how awkward it may be instead of telling other people; on the information receiver’s part (LOL), it is not fair to them because you are influencing someone’s opinion about another person even though it may not be intentional; the victim probably does whatever they do innocently and may just need to be corrected?; and some other reasons.
Personally, if you do have a problem with someone that you want to talk about, I don’t like to hear names; especially if I know the person, because there is this kind of “judgment” that most of the time takes place in my head. But thank God for his assistance because I can pray for Him to remove the judgement, but it doesn’t mean I like the judgement taking place in my head.
At the end of the day, there are both sides to a story anyway, so I think it’s best to keep that in mind when something is being told to you about someone else…even if that person may have a reputation of doing bad things. Justice is of God ϑ.
So basically, for now and with my level of spirituality, if you are going to mention someone’s name when you’re talking about them (in a non-gossip manner), I’d rather you not tell me.